Beer Commissioner Speaks on Dedication
Normally the Beer Commissioner is a pretty self-confident guy. I do not question alot of decisions that I make, and typically do not second guess myself.
Today, I took a journey through my mind, and meddled in self-doubt. I wonder do I have the dedication and committment to be the "Beer Commissioner". I asked myself, would I go to jail for 30 years over a case of beer? I immediately answered, "no." Then I asked myself, well is there anyone in the world that would go to jail over a case of beer? I then said, "well, YES THERE IS!"
Evan Lyons of Sioux City, Iowa, age 29, decided he wanted his case of Budweiser so bad, he was willing to risk 30 years in the slammer for it. Unfortunately for Evan, he was caught, and since, he is habitually stupid, was sentenced to 30 years in jail for stealing two cases of Budweiser. He was also ordered to pay restitution to the Kum & Go for the two cases of beer he stole. Apparently he was able to drink the beer, which is good, because I'm not guessing they serve up beer in the Iowa State Penitentiary System.
So, this guy Evan had me thinking, is he more dedicated than me to be the beer commissioner? After all, I wouldn't spend 30 years in jail for anything, much less a couple of cases of beer. Then, I thought I have to remain the beer commissioner. Does Bud Selig go around gas stations stealing baseball hats? Does Roger Goddell go to truck stops and steal a Raiders car flag? No! They don't. And why? Because they aren't stupid. I don't steal beer. I buy my beer like every other beer loving person (Note: Any breweries wishing me to sample their beer and write glowingly about it on my website need only send me free beer to do so.)
I like beer alot. I like talking about stupid criminals too. So, when we have a stupid criminal who gets 30 years for stealing beer, you know this has to be a no-brainer for a blog. I've seen lots of stupid things in my life. Representing criminals, I've seen more stupid things than most people. But, I have never seen anything so dumb in my life, as some idiot waking up one morning and deciding you know, I'd really like to spend the next 30 years in jail, let me go knock off the Kum & Go. Your Beer Commissioner does not have that type of dedication to his beverage, but I do have committment, and I commit to you, to not be that stupid.
Today, I took a journey through my mind, and meddled in self-doubt. I wonder do I have the dedication and committment to be the "Beer Commissioner". I asked myself, would I go to jail for 30 years over a case of beer? I immediately answered, "no." Then I asked myself, well is there anyone in the world that would go to jail over a case of beer? I then said, "well, YES THERE IS!"
Evan Lyons of Sioux City, Iowa, age 29, decided he wanted his case of Budweiser so bad, he was willing to risk 30 years in the slammer for it. Unfortunately for Evan, he was caught, and since, he is habitually stupid, was sentenced to 30 years in jail for stealing two cases of Budweiser. He was also ordered to pay restitution to the Kum & Go for the two cases of beer he stole. Apparently he was able to drink the beer, which is good, because I'm not guessing they serve up beer in the Iowa State Penitentiary System.
So, this guy Evan had me thinking, is he more dedicated than me to be the beer commissioner? After all, I wouldn't spend 30 years in jail for anything, much less a couple of cases of beer. Then, I thought I have to remain the beer commissioner. Does Bud Selig go around gas stations stealing baseball hats? Does Roger Goddell go to truck stops and steal a Raiders car flag? No! They don't. And why? Because they aren't stupid. I don't steal beer. I buy my beer like every other beer loving person (Note: Any breweries wishing me to sample their beer and write glowingly about it on my website need only send me free beer to do so.)
I like beer alot. I like talking about stupid criminals too. So, when we have a stupid criminal who gets 30 years for stealing beer, you know this has to be a no-brainer for a blog. I've seen lots of stupid things in my life. Representing criminals, I've seen more stupid things than most people. But, I have never seen anything so dumb in my life, as some idiot waking up one morning and deciding you know, I'd really like to spend the next 30 years in jail, let me go knock off the Kum & Go. Your Beer Commissioner does not have that type of dedication to his beverage, but I do have committment, and I commit to you, to not be that stupid.
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